When Intimacy Fades in your Relationship

Affection can come in many forms from hand-holding to sexual intimacy. A loss of intimate affection in a long-term relationship is common and can come with a range of other issues. Over 20% of respondents to a comprehensive survey of visitors to our website say they do not feel excited about a future with their partner. Let’s look at the areas of the relationship that a loss of intimate affection can affect.

Emotional Distance: Intimate affection, such as physical touch and sexual intimacy, is a way for partners to express their love and emotional connection. When this affection wanes, it can lead to emotional distance between partners. They may feel less connected, less loved, and less desired, which can result in feelings of loneliness and isolation.

Decreased Communication: Lack of intimate affection can lead to a decrease in open and honest communication. Partners may become hesitant to discuss their needs and desires, as well as any issues or concerns they have in the relationship. This lack of communication can lead to misunderstandings and unaddressed problems.

Increased Tension and Resentment: As the loss of intimate affection persists, tension and resentment may build up in the relationship. One or both partners may feel rejected or neglected, and these negative emotions can lead to arguments and conflicts.

Infidelity: A lack of intimacy in a relationship may lead one or both partners to seek emotional or physical intimacy elsewhere. This can result in infidelity, which can be extremely damaging to the relationship and both individuals’ mental health.

Relationship Breakdown: Ultimately, a persistent loss of intimate affection can lead to the breakdown of the relationship. When partners no longer feel loved, desired, or emotionally connected, they may choose to end the relationship, either through separation or divorce.


So how can I bring back the intimacy for our relationship?

It’s important to address the issue of a loss of intimate affection in a relationship through open and honest communication. Discuss why the relationship has been less intimate, go back to the beginning and think about what could have caused a distance between you and your partner, underlying issues are often the root cause of a lack of intimacy in a relationship.

Set realistic expectations for intimacy. Understand that it may take time to rebuild physical intimacy, and progress may be slow. Avoid pressuring your partner or making them feel guilty about the lack of intimacy. Rebuilding intimacy takes time and effort, be patient with yourself and your partner. Understand that both of you may have your own struggles and fears regarding intimacy, and showing empathy and support can make the process smoother.


If the lack of intimacy is deeply rooted or if you’re unable to make progress on your own, consider speaking to us at Aligned with Love and expert therapist Matt and Rebeca can help you turn your relationship around.

We recently had sex coach Dr Patti Britton on The Relationship Breakthrough show to share her secrets on how you can overcome these intimate issues within your relationship.

We looked at:

– How do we deal with the lifestyle-related challenges meaning that by the end of the day we feel that we have little or nothing to give?

– How important is orgasm, and is goal-oriented sex the best sex?

– The differences that we need to understand between men and women and how we find safety and connection in different ways

– How do we find the balance between supporting our partner to meet their needs versus meeting our own needs

– Why is the focus on consent so important and having the ability to say yes or no, in order to be fully empowered

– What is means when sex becomes a sacred experience, and how we can access that

– Specific take-aways that will help immediately to reignite your sex life