Who hasn’t ever felt the painful loss of a loved one and its natural grief for a while? You start thinking of them, you start withdrawing from the world, and you start resisting to accept it… BUT… eventually… YOU NEED TO MOVE ON!
Insanity, obsessive-compulsive disorder, depression and difficulty to sleep are just some of the symptoms that it can involve.
Love addiction has been scientifically recognised as cocaine addiction since it creates the same chemical reactions in the brain and the euphoria that makes the emotional mind overtakes the rational one! When that happens we´re done! We can’t think with clarity, we can’t focus on anything as we spend most of the time creating fantasies in our minds until we finally satiate our urge! Food, alcohol, shopping, gambling or sex for example act in the same way in our brain.
When we finish a relationship not only we need to face and reorganise our life without them but also the chemical withdrawal in our brain!
Best solution à Contact a great professional rather than keep talking with friends or family and keep ingraining your emotional addiction habit as you do so!
Here’s some tips to overcome love addiction:
1- AWARENESS: Check your thoughts and realise how they feed your fantasies and notice how you feel when you are not in a relationship. When you finally manage to get used to the new reality without that partner the new hunting process starts taking place at the back of your mind and before you know it you´re hooked again! Also, notice how depression or feelings of worthlessness or loneliness get a great place in your life when you are not in a relationship! And finally, challenge your belief system to deeply get to the root of the addiction. Think of the people you grew up with and see how similar patterns are very likely to be present in your family. Usually we try to compensate for the lack of love that we had or that we perceived when we were children with the love of our partner. It is quite frequently the dynamic protector-needy where one partner gets their doses of significance and validation from helping and supporting the other one who allows the dynamic due to a needy behaviour.
2- EMBRACING: surrendering to the new situation and embracing it is key to move on and minimise the pain. It is necessary to forgive yourself for what you´re going through and to forgive your ex-partner for the end of the relationship. It is important to ask yourself what you´ve learn from that relationship and to remember it, to remain grateful for that and for the great moments and to become your best friend focusing on your own needs and embracing your own company before you even think of starting a new relationship! This is key. If you don’t follow this step you are at the mercy of your emotional mind and another possible break-up coming your way
3- SPECIFICATIONS: Determine the qualities that you value the most in a partner and the ones that you would not accept under ANY circumstances! Also and most importantly, determine your highest values and your most important needs and how you like to meet them and make sure that the candidate fits into your glove! Make sure that you meet all that so you can be a match for a partner with those qualities!
I wish I could do this for you but eventually IT IS YOUR CHOICE: you or your partner first.
YOU MUST BECOME YOUR FAVOURITE PERSON SO YOU ARE ABLE TO GENUINELY LOVE SOMEONE ELSE AND HAVE A MAGIC RELATIONSHIP
IT IS YOUR CHOICE, WHAT ARE YOU CHOOSING?